Being caught having a wank by a parent is pretty embarrassing as it is, but at least the shame doesn’t leave the confines of your own home.
However, in this social media age where pretty much everything is out for everyone to see, this mum (who was a bit new to the whole Twitter thing), asked the internet what this was…
CJ is the only on to use the downstairs bathroom and I went down to clean and seen this anyone know what it is pic.twitter.com/Tmb4jJiM3z
— Patty Parsons (@PattyParsonsPat) November 22, 2015
As you’d expect, people were pretty swift to reply and give the clueless mum a few lessons in sex.
Oh, they do celebrity ones? What a treat! Understandably, Patty appeared to be in denial about her sons sexual exploration…
But to her dismay, the guys behind the contraption were quick to confirm it was in fact a fleshlight… awkward.
— Official Fleshjack (@Fleshjack) November 25, 2015
A standard parenting technique, she deflected the blame onto the company and she wasn’t very happy… at all.
People were quick to point out that her young lad could do a lot of others at 19, so why not wank?
— Jarrid Best (@Euthanasia1978) November 26, 2015
As always with the internet, things escalated quickly and she seriously believed she would rather risk her son’s life in the army, than masturbate. Yeah, because that makes loads of sense, doesn’t it?
Don’t worry though guys, all is not lost. They had a little heart to heart over the matter and of course he didn’t use it. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.
CJ says he don’t pleasure himself and I believe him. Caseclosed# — Patty Parsons (@PattyParsonsPat) November 27, 2015
Ahh mate, that’s the oldest excuse in the book. How could she fall for that? But wait, the plot thickens…
Well CJ said that flashlight masterbater was his buddys and its out if this house. Buddy ain’t aloud over for thanksgiving
— Patty Parsons (@PattyParsonsPat) November 26, 2015
There’s question marks whether this actually happened or if it’s a parody account- but either way, it’s pretty genius.
We’d still want to know what went down at Thanksgiving at Patty’s house this year…