What It’s Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random People

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63221UNILAD imageoptim naughty america What Its Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random PeopleNaughty America

“I’m sorry, but that is definitely a vagina. Is this a sex thing?” I asked my friend. “You didn’t know,” came their blunt response. My friends had convinced me to come to the opening night of an art exhibition. Not usually my thing, but I was trying to be open-minded.

Then I saw the sign outside the building.

The event’s logo was an odd line drawing, two diagrams made of numbers and arrows, and they were bizarrely sexual. I couldn’t put my finger on why. It looked like an unfinished dot-to-dot drawing; one that you would start then recoil halfway through as you realise you’re dutifully assembling a girthy, veiny penis.

We rang the doorbell, and the door was slowly opened by a shaven-headed woman who beckoned us inside. We found ourselves in a large white room with various exhibits dotted around.

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One exhibit that caught my eye was a jigsaw of a naked guy, sitting on a chair with his pants around his ankles and a content look on his face. We assembled him, frantically looking for a dick-piece before realising he was actually holding a watermelon in front of his genitals.

As I was stood staring, baffled by this odd image, a voice appeared in my ear: “That’s me.”

I spun round and found a tall man with a topknot pointing at the jigsaw, beaming proudly. He told me he was inspired to make it by a porn flick he saw, in which a man fucked a watermelon. I slowly drifted away, politely replying that it sounded like an interesting film.

Next I wandered over to a large canvas tent. On closer inspection I it had three men in it. Naked men. Through the shroud, I could just about make out quivering arse cheeks as they walked around and lounged on cushions.

A woman approached the tent, took off her shoes and slipped inside. The naked guys greeted her warmly, and she joined them in conversation. My curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to take the plunge.

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Taking my shoes off, I awkwardly knocked on the door, which didn’t make a sound because the walls were canvas. As I pawed pathetically at the cloth, a smiling naked Asian man put me out of my misery and invited me in.

I sat on a cushion and the leader of the trio, an older man with a flaccid dong the size of a baby’s leg, kindly asked me if ‘I would like to get naked also’. I thanked him for the invitation, but said I would quite like to keep my clothes on. He smiled, nodded, and handed me a virtual reality headset.

“Take this and put it on, and you will understand why we are naked. And perhaps you will want to be naked too,” he said. My giant-cocked guru helped me put on the visor and headphones, then told me to get comfortable and enjoy the film. At once, I was in the middle of a giant, white warehouse, with the sun beaming down from huge skylights.

It was quite pleasant.

38771UNILAD imageoptim VR Bangers What Its Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random PeopleVR Bangers

There were also six naked people standing around me in a circle. I was turning my head to see them all, curious at this amazing technology, yet also very aware that in reality I was in a small room with three scrotums lurking nearby.

I leant back and my fingers grabbed something soft for a split second, before I recoiled, keeping my hands safely in my lap for the remaining duration. It may have been a cushion. It may have been something else. We will never know. No one complained, anyway.

Back in virtual orgy land things were heating up. There were three men and three women, and they were closing in on me, staring deep into my soul through my disembodied pair of frantically swivelling eyes. In a heartbeat the scene morphed. The six people were now entwined around me, caressing each other gently, looking at me flirtatiously.

giphyvrlansbury What Its Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random People

The scene changed again and I found I was floating in the air. Looking down, I saw the orgy unfolding directly below me. The headphones were playing ambient music, a trippy mix of sitars and the occasional didgeridoo.

The participants slowly gained intensity while I was continually transported to different view points around the warehouse. Sometimes I was in the middle of them, sometimes I was off to one side, watching everyone bump uglies from the benches like a prom night reject.

The whole thing had a sensual, relaxed vibe, rather than the Brazzers sheen, with all the frantic pummelling and fake orgasms. Everyone was helping each other out. Sometimes they’d all pile on one girl and show her a good time, then they’d partner up and play around. Everyone looked happy.

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After 15 minutes or so it reached a crescendo. The scene warped, and suddenly the warehouse was gone, its walls replaced by people – naked, gently humping people. Countless tits and arses were gyrating before my eyes no matter where I turned my head. I was staring around, trapped in this gigantic ball of fuck.

The music was going wild. You know that hectic scene in the original Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, where they sail into that tunnel and the music gets louder and wild images of awful things play out on the walls as the boat goes faster and Gene Wilder goes stark raving bonkers at the helm? Well imagine that, but with thousands of jiggling cocks.

And then it was done. The six guys and girls faded back into view, laid around me, sighing, smiling contentedly, caressing each other and waving at me. I watched them as I slowly retreated, getting waved away like the end of the most fucked up Teletubbies episode ever. Bye bye, orgy friends.

54866UNILAD imageoptim Flickr cykocurt What Its Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random PeopleFlickr/cykocurt

I took the helmet off and found myself staring down the barrel of a large, serene penis. I handed the headset back to my baton-toting guide. I was back to reality, back to the real world, where things made sense. Except, you know, I was still surrounded by naked dudes.

“That was… intense. I’ve never seen anything like it,” I told him. “So now you see why we are naked. Perhaps you would now like to be naked as well?” he replied.

“Erm,” should I get my dick out? “Nah, I’m good. Cheers though.”

giphyreddwarf What Its Like To Have A VR Orgy With Loads Of Random People

To be perfectly honest, I don’t know what I took away from my virtual orgy. It definitely wasn’t an erotic experience, but I don’t think it was meant to be. In the end, all the nudity and flopping fleshy bits just made the sex seem very, very normal.

Gone were the supermodels and sex professionals. It’s like in a horror film – as soon as you see the monster or ghost it’s not scary anymore. Your imagination makes it far more intense than the reality could ever be. These were just everyday human beings having a good time, all with their own imperfections. It felt healthy.

Oh, and to answer the question you’re definitely thinking: yes, it did smell like balls in there.

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