Ever wondered what human flesh actually tastes like? If a dead body can ejaculate, or if you can really die of a broken heart?
Buzzfeed put these questions and more to experts and here are five of the actual scientific answers that they came back with. Gag reflex at the ready.
If You Sneeze With Your Eyes Open, Will They Pop Out?
Dr Rachel Vreeman, told NBC News in 2013 it is ‘extremely unlikely’. Apparently shutting your eyes when you sneeze is simply a reflex. Dr Vreeman said:
It is certainly possible to keep your eyes open if you try while you are sneezing … but it requires working against the reflex.
Sounds untested to me, extremely unlikely means it could happen. Shit.
Can You Literally Die From Heartbreak?
Not quite, however there is a heart condition that doctors believe is caused by significant emotional stress, such as bereavement or being involved in a disaster.
According to the NHS, broken heart syndrome causes the heart muscle to become “suddenly weakened or ‘stunned’, causing the left ventricle (one of the heart’s main chambers) to change shape.”
Takotsubo cardiomyopathy – more commonly referred to as broken heart syndrome – has symptoms similar to those of a heart attack, however it is both temporary and reversible, so everyone can stop being so dramatic.
What Would Human Flesh Taste Like If We Ate It?
The jury is still out on this one, although the consensus is that a juicy rump would taste more like pork than anything else.
According to notorious internet cannibal Armin Meiwes: “The flesh tastes like pork, a little bit more bitter, stronger. It tastes quite good.”
Another murderer – and organ player – Karl Denke, was found to have killed at least 42 people and even sold some of his victim’s flesh as pork at a meat market, before he was arrested in 1924. Locals claimed that the flesh he was selling tasted enough like pork that no one questioned it.
However 1920s author and journalist William Seabrook – claiming to have sourced some human flesh from a Parisien hospital – described it as being, “like good, fully developed veal, not young, but not yet beef.”
Sounds better than bitter pork to me…
If You Were On Your Period, And Then You Died, Would The Blood Still Flow?
Mortician Carla Valentine told BuzzFeed Science:
“The blood wouldn’t ‘flow’ as such, because the circulation stops and muscular contraction also ceases. However, it would remain moist for a while before it dried (as normal blood would), so any residual blood/membrane could still leak out when you moved the body. It’s the uterus and prostate gland which are the last organs to decompose in a dead body – they remain recognisable the longest.”
Can A Dead Body Ejaculate?
Surely the defining question of 2015. It turns out quotes from convicted necrophiliacs on this particular subject are hard – sorry – difficult, to come across (excuse the phrasing). So, turning once again to Carla Valentine we learn:
It can’t ejaculate, like, squirt (because there’s no muscle contraction/peristalsis). However, semen very commonly seeps out of the end of penises of deceased males whether they’re slightly erect or not. Not a sex thing, just one of those odd biological occurrences.
Who said learning wasn’t fun? Class dismissed.