Urban legends of people injuring themselves in weird and wonderful ways during sex are common but it seems it may be a more dangerous activity than you thought.
The National Electronic Injury Surveillance System (NEISS) sheds some much needed light on the wealth and variety of sex-related injuries in the U.S.
According to a Vice report, the data shows there have been 450 reported sex injuries over the last six years.
Although these make up under 0.02 per cent of the 2.3 million reported general injuries over the time period, according to the experts most sex-related injuries go unreported.
Among these embarrassing incidents there are some pretty impressive ‘standouts’.
A 17-year-old guy went to hospital complaining of stomach pains – and that he had a ‘foreign body’ in his anus. According to him he inserted a pencil into his rectum and then had anal sex with it still in there – he was treated and released, reports Distractify.
There was also the case of a 62-year-old man who put homemade PCVP pipe rings and a ring from a horse halter around his penis. He showed up at hospital with a crushed penis but luckily he could be treated and was sent home.
It seems like the majority of injuries involve ‘foreign objects’ ‘disappearing’ into orifices after insertion.
According to Vice, these were usually vibrators or other sex toys but occasionally something a little more unusual such as a ‘spikey rubber ball that lights up’, a pool ball or even a screwdriver (maybe someone misunderstood the name?).
It doesn’t end there. Other injuries included sprains, fractures, concussions, lacerations, and loss of consciousness from oxygen deprivation.
Fortunately none of the reported injuries have been fatal but according to emergency physician Dr. Robert Glatter people often delay seeking medical help through embarrassment.
He told Vice:
Patients delay and sometimes don’t come in for a few days. The longer you wait, sometimes you can even get septic. We always have respect and privacy and never pass any judgement.
While the majority of sex-related injuries occur in the ‘lower trunk’ and pubic region, the head, neck, and mouth also suffer from sex mishaps.
A 19-year-old woman allegedly suffered a dental injury when a sex swing detached from the ceiling and hit her in the mouth.
It also turns out that some months are more dangerous than others when it comes to sex mishaps:
Thankfully the Valentine’s Day ‘peak’ has now passed and March looks like a safer month for everyone.
Gives new meaning to ‘safe sex’…