So the transfer window is almost closed, and there are more than a couple of clubs making some pretty questionable purchases, otherwise known as panic buys.
Few things rank higher in the calendar of a football fan than Transfer Deadline Day, and Sky Sports News do it better than anyone else.
Jim White, that yellow tie and the breaking news bar are what we spend all summer looking forward to, and this season is no different.
The title race might be looking pretty much dead in the water (because let’s face it, Manchester City will have it tied up by Christmas at this rate), but the transfer window has a bit of mileage left in it yet.
With that in mind, we have come up with the only drinking game you need to be playing as you sit back, relax, and wait for those deals to roll in.
Drink one finger when…
Jorge Mendes is mentioned
Your club sign a player
A player leaves on loan
Any mention of Jim White’s yellow tie is made
Tweets from a player’s account are mentioned
Drink two fingers when…
The yellow bar appears at the bottom of the screen
‘Spanish expert’ Guillem Balague is quoted or offers his opinion
A new signing says the words ‘proud’ or ‘it’s a dream’
A medical is completed
A player is pictured holding their new shirt
Drink four fingers when…
Arsenal are linked with a panic buy
A transfer falls through
Harry Redknapp leans out of his car window
A player you have only ever heard of in the last five minutes and have to YouTube is signed
Jim or Natalie remind us when the window closes around Europe
Down your drink if…
The transfer record is broken
The roving reporter has to ask fans to calm down
The window closes
Jim White starts tending on Twitter
A deal is reported after the window has closed
Do a shot…
If any fans outside the ground manage to outdo the dildo incident
A club clearly overpays for a player on a Fernando Torres type level
A club are linked with a player they have no chance of signing a la Chelsea and Pogba or Manchester United and Gareth Bale
And finally, drink any time Jim White says any of the following…
The clock is ticking
We can now reveal
Put pen to paper
This just in
You’ll hear it here first
The club is working hard to make it happen
The window has slammed shut