Having a girlfriend with a seven-year-old brother means that a lot of nights in quite quickly turn into nights in watching Bolt followed by a double dose of Despicable Me.
Thankfully a lot of kid’s movie directors feel our pain so they fill their films right up to the brim with some pretty explicit innuendos, according to Looper.
Personally my favourite TV show when I was a little-un was Captain Pugwash. There was just something enticing about Horatio Pugwash sailing the high seas with Tom the Cabin Boy in eternal pursuit of Cut-Throat Jake.
Little did I know that Pugwash was actually a slang term for semen and oral sex, and Master Mates can sound quite different when spoken aloud and fast. There is also an urban legend about characters such as Seaman Stains and Roger the Cabin Boy – but they were later found to be false…
But what certainly isn’t false is the amount of double entendres which have slipped their way into children’s films today.
We won’t spoil it all for you but let me just say that some of the things that made their way into kids films are pretty damn controversial.
My personal favourite in the video is taken from The Brave Little Toaster to the Rescue and as Looper put it, ‘the writers didn’t even try and hide this one’.
In the particular scene a computer says to a mouse:
Wow. Wittgenstein is searching through all of my files. Searching through regions here to for only dreamed of by man. Ooo. That feels sorta good. My memory banks are being stroked and by an expert. I feel something, something happening inside of me and I can’t keep it to myself any longer.
Que a printer ejaculation.
Another pretty graphic scene can be found in The Road to El Dorado when the two main lovebirds are having an out of view ‘kiss’, only Tulio lets off far too many moans and groans for it to simply be a bit of a cuddle. Oh dear.
Enjoy the vid.