What happens in [insert lads holiday destination here] stays in [repeat lads holiday destination here].
That is the rule that most fellas live by when they head away with their squad for some booze and sunshine – but it isn’t the only rule this particular chap is going to have to live by if he knows what’s good for him.
Kieran Lumsden was about to set out with his mates to Magaluf, but his girlfriend Whitney Travers appreciates that men can be simple creatures, and so set out a list of simple rules that Kieran is to ignore at his own peril.
Whitneys took psychoness to a new level?? pic.twitter.com/jq0BUflaqw
— Keern (@KieranLumsden67) July 31, 2016
They’re a bit like the ten commandments – except cheating is clearly the ultimate crime, while murder doesn’t even get an honourable mention…
I’m not sure who Kim is but her being told, life being a living hell, and all his Celtic gear being destroyed just doesn’t seem worth it.
Good call on the tattoo though – Harry Potter scars have already been trending on the drunken strip of the Spanish town.
Hang on though, how is Kieran meant to avoid all contact with anyone of the opposite sex while simultaneously telling every member of the opposite sex that he has a girlfriend?
Whatever happened to good ol’ fashioned trust hey?!