Hollywood has always been a place of oddities, but it really took a turn for the bizarre when Shia LaBeouf graced our TV screens and popular media with his presence.
The latest in the string of crazy events that make up Shia LaBeouf‘s life – his wedding to actress Mia Goth – was live streamed for us all to watch on in shock and awe, playing voyeur to the happiest day of Shia’s life.
The 30-year-old American Honey actor stayed true to form and orchestrated the weirdest looking celebrity wedding ceremony, officiated by an Elvis impersonator. Obviously.
Why is Shia LaBeouf's wedding the Twin Peaks remake? pic.twitter.com/pEhfWPjG5S
— Andrew Gruttadaro (@andrewgrutt) October 10, 2016
The happy couple said their ‘I do’s’ and promised to ‘always be each others’ teddy bear and give each other a hunka-hunka love’ – which I think translates from Hollywood as ‘be truthful and faithful, and, you know, take care of each other’.
TMZ reported the actor spent $700 (£570) on the Blue Hawaii package at the Vegas wedding chapel, proving that (almost) free love is the best type of love, even for someone who’s minted.
Knowing Shia, I’m guessing this is some sort of social art commentary on the billion-dollar consumer business that is the wedding industry?
Or maybe the newlyweds just really love Elvis.
The package included one hula dancer, a six rose bouquet for Mia and a matching boutonniere for Shia, 10 candid ceremony prints, a courtesy round-trip limo service from any hotel on the strip or downtown and the Elvis officiant (including three musical serenades for mood music).
Because nothing says romantic private wedding like Elvis on the old live stream, for all of Twitter to pass judgement on – which, of course, it did.
Shia LaBeouf's wedding is a healthy 8.7 on the oh mate scale. pic.twitter.com/8SyPbAYlIi
— Dan (@ThatConnArtist) October 10, 2016
Is it weird that I totally am teary eyed & find Shia Labeouf's Vegas wedding video totally romantic? With the Elvis priest & all. #ILoveLove
— Aferdita K (@AferDIVA) October 11, 2016
Shia turbo-charged the wedding package by opting for a few extras, including the pink Caddy with fog machine, to the tune of $175 (£140).
The wedding – ever since Mia Goth was seen wearing an engagement ring in March this year – has been highly anticipated by fans and curiosity collectors equally.
— Molly Fite (@moofite) March 19, 2016
…And it lived up to expectations.
Shia met Mia Goth on the set of Lars Von Triers’ Nymphomaniac II in 2012.
Even though it’s pretty gimmicky to turn your nuptials into a public stunt, it is nice to see actors getting married rather than divorced, as seems to be the trend these days.
While I’m sure Shia will come up with some abstract artistic explanation for the unusual wedding that leaves us all concerned about his mental stability, if the newlyweds approach their marriage with the same light-hearted sense of joy captured at their wedding, maybe they’ll live a long and happy – if slightly loopy – life together.
Only one question remains: What the fuck will happen on their honeymoon?
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.