In the words of David Bowie, ‘Ahhhh, fashion!’.
While we all sit here in some form of clothing, considered fashionable or otherwise, our garments will all have been designed by someone.
And though fashion designers have given us many, many great things – socks, pants, those tiny pockets above the normal pocket on jeans – they also grace the world with some more questionable items.
I get it, inspiration sometimes runs dry, you’re stressing about coming up with the next big thing and your mojo just isn’t flowing. You take a break, need some time to rest your weary head, so you whack on your favourite old sitcom, throw yourself down on the sofa and try not to worry about it.
And what happens? Inspiration strikes, your muse makes a surprise visit and a lightbulb appears above your head. No one knows when it’s going to hit, but when it does, grab your pen and make sure you get it down.
And so we come to the latest piece of winter outerwear from Balenciaga.
This guy is going to set you back a cool $9,000 (or £6985.49 according to Barneys).
Described as an ‘oversized parka’, the coat features a variety of colours and no less than seven layers. While you might be thinking ‘great, so that’s seven for the price of one (very expensive) coat’, the various layers are, alas, not detachable.
Are they making seven kinda average coats look like one big average one? I’ll let you be the judge.
It’s proving quite popular though, as at the time of writing there’s only one left on their site, so you gotta be quick if you want one.
However, if you miss out, or simply don’t have thousands of pounds at your disposable to spend on a massive coat, I reckon this look could be easily replicated.
Much like our friend Joey Tribbiani, just raid other people’s wardrobes until you find your desired amount of layers, and rock it.
The desired look can be achieved for a fraction of the cost. A quick whip round your work mates might provide you with all you need.
As all fashionistas, like the guy in the photo, know – the coat doesn’t make the look. You have to pair it with something killer.
Well fear not, Balenciaga have you covered again. And though it’s not one shoe that looks like seven layers of shoes, it is a hybrid of a classic platform shoe with the even more classic croc.
A pair of these clunky but irresistible beauties will set you back £645, which is nothing compared to the coat, but will set it off perfectly I reckon.
According to Balenciaga:
Balenciaga casts the classic Croc slipper in a punk-ish new light for SS18.
In a whimsical bubblegum-pink hue, the front is decorated with a selection of irreverent pop-culture charms including logo plaques, avocados, flags, and pug faces to create an effect like a fridge of souvenir magnets.
Take advantage of the high platform sole to lift an ankle-skimming dress.
Thanks Balenciaga, I think I will. Also, let me know if you’re going to do other colours. Asking for a friend.
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Charlie Cocksedge is a journalist at UNILAD. He graduated from the University of Manchester with an MA in Creative Writing, where he learnt how to write in the third person, before getting his NCTJ. His work has also appeared in such places as The Guardian, PN Review and the bin.