Sometimes I do find myself wondering about the state of humanity and a certain viral Facebook post will demonstrate why.
Twenty three-year-old Adam Smith, a fraud advisor from Greenock, Scotland, was settling down into a night shift one day when he noticed he had a ‘message request’ on his Facebook messenger app.
Accepting it, Adam was pretty shocked to discover it was from one of his old primary school classmates who he hadn’t spoken to since the heady days of Year 6.
Things only got stranger when Adam opened the message and saw that the guy was claiming he was owed £60 having been given faulty fake bank notes from Adam.
Accompanying a photo of one of the notes, the angry message read:
Heard you [do] fake notes. And they came two me ya ham you owe me 60 qid. Ya trout.
And tell Rachel am going to sh*te in hur kettle. U better anser me lad.
Now, now, calm down. What has Rachel got to do with any of this? And is sh*tting in someone’s kettle really the best way to solve this argument? Or any argument for that matter.
Also when did ‘trout’ become an insult? Surely there are better ones in the book?
Speaking exclusively to UNILAD, Adam explained he was shocked not only by the message, but also by the odd insult.
At first I thought it was some kind of joke as the person mailing me was someone who was in my primary school, I hadn’t heard from him since then and found it pretty weird he had mailed me.
I was even more shocked by the messages that followed. I wouldn’t have found it as bad if he didn’t open the conversation by calling me a ‘trout’, not really insulting I know but it’s the principle .
This is true Adam, this is true.
Not having any of the guy’s nonsense, Adam sent an equally annoyed message back writing:
F*ckin wit. With the f*ck u on aboot, wo even ur you? What fake notes?
Wait a dae f*ckin know you. Listen here ya wee f*ckin c*nt, a never gave any c*nt any fake notes and a dont ‘dae fake notes’ so f*ck knowd what ats aboot second of all dont f*ckin message me saying sh*t like this again ya wee c*nt, well seeing your still a wee f*ckin mongo like you were in primary school.
Who the f*ck said a gave people fake notes? And what Racheal said a done that cus a think they huv us both on a wind up here.
Who said a gave them fake notes?
Well Adam certainly made his point clear!
Things got even more silly when the guy replied saying no one had told him about Adam providing fake notes, he just assumed it himself when he saw Adam’s name on the note.
Clearly this guy had no idea the name and face of Adam Smith, a Scottish economist who helped lay down the foundations for free market economic theory, appears on every single £20 banknote which has been produced since 2006.
But to ask another important and pressing question, why would someone who makes fake banknotes print their name on them? Seriously?!?
Of course Adam was taken aback when he saw the guy’s reasoning being both horrified and very amused.
Deciding to shut him down, he replied:
Are you actually f*cking retarded? Mate, Adam Smith is a famous c*nt thats on money.
Mate, search ‘Adam Smith’ on google. Adam Smith money on google images ya mad yin.
So are we Adam, so are we.
Knowing this conversation just had to be shared with the world, Adam posted it to Facebook and of course it went viral receiving 1,500 likes and 1,300 shares at time of writing (September 19).
He told UNILAD as it spread online the guy noticed the post but thankfully saw the funny side to it all:
When he explained the whole ‘name on the note’ thing it all made sense (sort of), but it was that out of nowhere I knew I had to post it.
He was angry with me for posting it at first but he eventually seen the funny side of it and made peace so I’m glad he learned to roll with it.
I wasn’t expecting the social media attention it received (and neither did he apparently) but I’m glad people find it funny and people somehow understand what is actually said in the conversation because I’m pretty sure some of the words aren’t even attempted to be spelled correctly or even exist.
I am pretty sure viral fame meant the whole ridiculous conversation was kind of worth it, spelling mistakes and all.
Emily Murray is a journalist at UNILAD. She graduated from the University of Leeds with a BA in English Literature and History before studying for a Masters in Journalism at the University of Salford. Emily has previously worked for the BBC, ITV and Trinity Mirror. When Emily isn’t writing about topics including mental health and entertainment, you can find her at the cinema which is her second home.