If there’s one thing we’ve learnt from the new series of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire on ITV this week, it’s, you don’t want Jeremy Clarkson anywhere near you if you’re in a pub quiz or playing one of those old Who Wants To Be A Millionaire pub quiz machines.
Oh Jezza, you just can’t help causing controversy, can you? Admittedly, it must be tough with the new gig without a short ar*e or a boffin to make fun of, no caravans to explode or any 1997 Rover 200s to drive into concrete bollards.
But you know what, even without all your usual props, you’ve made primetime telly bearable for those of us who weren’t in the pub last night, (May 11).
Normally we’re like: ‘Did you see this clown get a blatantly obvious question wrong?! What a muppet! Aren’t we so smart.’ But, hmb, this time round, Jeremy Clarkson is the one coming out looking like a tit, after a contestant was stumped at the £16,000 question.
Do you know: ‘What type of wild animal is an ibex?’
In case you cba to watch the video, the options were goat, pig, hare and deer.
Blasé, cocky, bighead – these are terms often attributed to Clarkson’s presenting style, and he gave a master class with the question and answer above.
Contestant Alan had by this point used the new fangled ‘Ask The Host’ lifeline, which Clarkson smeared in his face saying: ‘I’m going to really annoy you now. I know the answer.’ You’d never get that attitude with Tarrant, I tell thee.
Alan then called a mate, who was pretty sure the answer was deer.
So it’s obviously dear. I’ve just spent the first 20 minutes of my weekend writing a story about a man answering a dear-related Millionaire question.
Even Clarkson knew:
I’m not even going to look at the screen. That’s the correct answer.
Wait for it. Wait for it. Wait for it…
Oh deer, oh deer, oh deer.
Folk on Twitter didn’t take too Kindly to Clarkson’s (Vauxhall) cavalier approach to Millionaire neither:
Jeremy Clarkson cockily telling a contestant he’d won £32k by being so confident he didn’t have to look at the screen for the answer – and then realising he was wrong! ?? What a prat. You’d never get Tarrant making such a fk-up! #Millionaire
— Hannah Rogers (@hannapatra) May 11, 2018
— Chris Rand ??????? (@chrisrand0) May 11, 2018
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL JEREMY CLARKSON FUCKED UP DA TING #WhoWantsToBeAMillionaire
— @RILEY25 (@RILEY25) May 11, 2018
Jeremy Clarkson on who wants to be a millionaire. Yes you are right you have won 32k oh wait no you have lost ? pic.twitter.com/W00BK47iOm
— Gary⭐️ (@chelsea1012) May 11, 2018
What a dick move from Jeremy Clarkson, oh my God. Sat here thinking wtf, it’s a goat ?? #WhoWantsToBeAMillionaire
— • (@imee___) May 11, 2018
It could be worse. You could ask your other half what they think is the correct answer to the £64,000 question, and then ignore them and go home £31,000 lighter. Oh hang on. That happened this week.
Faced with the question of: ‘Who did Boris Johnson succeed as Foreign Secretary in 2016?’ Lynn was scratching her head and, having used up her other lifelines, she only had one option left – ‘Phone a Friend’.
But like all good marriages, there wasn’t a great deal of trust when it came to a big money decision, and Lynn – for whatever reason – decided not to follow her chap’s advice.
Watch and squirm below:
At that point, the ever-helpful new host Jeremy Clarkson, who also didn’t know the answer, said:
May I make a suggestion – don’t go home tonight.
So if there’s anything we’ve learnt from this latest trip to Millionaire land, it’s: trust your friends’ advice, unless they’re wrong, and especially if they’re Clarkson.
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Tim Horner is a sub-editor at UNILAD. He graduated with a BA Journalism from University College Falmouth before most his colleagues were born. A previous editor of adult mags, he now enjoys bringing the tone down in the viral news sector.