I spent my nineteenth birthday at a Christmas party in Manchester before dancing with my editor, ordering a burger, and then falling asleep at Oxford Road station, waking up an hour later, and filling my half-eaten burger bag with half digested burger vomit and being helped onto a random train by a stranger.
Kylie Jenner almost did the same thing, just with a little less class.
She spent the big one-nine in a see-through (but not really see-through) catsuit, according to Jezebel.
If that wasn’t enough to fuel your
love insatiable hatred of the elitist Karashian / Jenner disease, then you’ll be more than pleased to find out that the now, self-proclaimed, broke Kylie Jenner, just bought herself a $200,000 Land Rover SV Autobiography.
The 18-year-old, who turns 19 on the tenth of this month, customised her Land Rover with a maroon-and-white leather interior and flat screen televisions.
After making the purchase, Kylie said:
I got a little excited and treated myself for my birthday.
Glad you didn’t get overexcited Kylie, you absolute fuckwit.
This Land Rover is just the latest in a long line of lavish and mind-numbing cars purchased by the reality star who lives a life which reigns about a million feet higher than any of our most exuberant perceptions of reality.
She’s also got a Ferrari, a Mercedes-Benz G-Wagon, and a Rolls Royce Ghost.
Meanwhile, I’m feeling guilty and slightly worried about spending £20 on a pizza last night. I’m going to regret that at the end of the month.
Enjoy your new car though Kylie and your flat screen TV too.
Joseph Loftus is a Gold Standard NCTJ journalist with four years experience working for international and regional press.
As well as working for UNILAD and LADbible, Joseph has worked as Liverpool Correspondent for Unsigned & Independent Magazine, as well as stints with the Liverpool Echo and Warrington Guardian.