Paul Rudd Responds Perfectly To Ant Man vs Thanos’ Anus Theory

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Of all the fan theories surrounding the Marvel Cinematic Universe, there’s one doing the rounds at the moment which some people are really clenching on to.

So why is this one sticking around and not being flushed away with all the others? Probably because it’s so stupidly simple and actually viable that people really want it to be true.

Ever since Avengers: Infinity War, fans have been wondering how our heroes are going to come back from the brink of destruction after Thanos wiped out half of literally everything just by clicking his fingers. It was a bit of a dick move by the big blue-y/purple-y Titan.

While many fans speculated about solving it by time travel, or mind control, or some secret weapon, or something to do with Brie Larson’s Captain Marvel, other fans latched on to one slightly immature – but totally feasible – theory that would be the perfect ending to this epic franchise.

You may have noticed the lack of the ageless Paul Rudd’s Scott Lang, aka Ant-Man, in Infinity War. Was this because he was off filming Ant-Man and the Wasp? Probably, but let’s put that aside for now and focus on this cracking theory instead.

As Ant-Man, Lang can shrink to – yep – the size of an ant. But he can also expand to around 65 feet tall. I know.

So here’s the theory – why doesn’t Ant-Man crawl up Thanos’ arse and then, when he’s up in his guts, quickly expand and destroy the Titan from the inside out? It’s sounds grim but it’s very doable.

Is this why Ant-Man is absent from Infinity War? Was he on a secret mission to covertly crawl up inside Thanos?

Well, the question was put to Paul Rudd himself, via entertainment.ie, which you can watch here:

Rudd expertly deflects the real question (he knows it would work), saying instead that ‘it’s a question for Thanos’.

Expounding, Rudd says: ‘If there’s one thing we’ve learned from Infinity War, it’s that Thanos can take a lot a punishment’. Tongue in cheek? Definitely.

The thing is, Rudd doesn’t rule it out as one of the things that may happen in Endgame, so I reckon it’s at least an option, though one that Dr Strange will probably fix when he reverses time by waving his hands around.

I wonder where the Wasp will go when Ant-Man is crawling up Thanos’ inside thigh…

Avengers: Endgame will be released in the UK on April 25, 2019.

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Charlie Cocksedge

Charlie Cocksedge is a journalist at UNILAD. He graduated from the University of Manchester with an MA in Creative Writing, where he learnt how to write in the third person, before getting his NCTJ. His work has also appeared in such places as The Guardian, PN Review and the bin.