Reckon you can put the calories away? No, like seriously, are you sure you’re good at eating food, because if you have a go at this mammoth breakfast and come out on the losing end you’re going to look like a right lemon.
Me? I’m not going to entertain the thought, I struggle to keep a bowl of cereal down in the morning. Anyway, if you’ve got the guts to binge on bacon or suck up lines of sausages like a bagless vacuum cleaner, then you’ll want to check this out.
They call it The Terminator 2, and with 65 items of your classic traditional English breakfast items (bacon, sausages, eggs, tomatoes, beans, hash browns, mushrooms, black pudding and toast, obvs) you’ll probably need to be as big as Arnie to complete it, and by ‘they’ I mean Shepherd’s Place Farm Cafe, near Haxey, Doncaster.
You’ll want to be putting that in your sat-nav stat, because if the idea of all those multiples of breakfast goodies being brought to you in one place – on a tray, because they don’t make plates big enough – then the fact they only charge £15 will have your wallet egging you on as much as your eyes are.
Farm owner Ted Phillips told FEMAIL he brought in the Terminator 2 breakfast because diners found his original Terminator – four items of each for £7.95 – too easy!
A lot of guys came from all over the north of England to try the Terminator, and women started to come to do it too.
Some of them were doing it easily, so we created the Terminator 2.
No one has yet completed the challenge, which comes as absolutely no surprise, I’m getting heartburn just looking at it.
It comes with a few teas or coffees to wash it down, just in case you haven’t been swayed by what’s been said already.
Should anyone complete the challenge, they’ll have their name added to the cafe’s wall of fame.
As it’s hard to judge the scale of stuff seen from mobile phone screens, that platter is 55cm x 40cm. Alan Partridge and his extra size plate need not apply.
And the best news is it’s one of those proper all day breakfasts, which are actually served all day long, as opposed to those odd cafes that think all day ends at 12pm.
As well as the cafe, the farm has a petting zoo, tea room and an ice cream parlour that has its own 10-scoop treat. (Perfect for washing down a massive breakie.)
If a full English isn’t your thing, and you’re more partial to a Maccie’s, then you’ve probably thought about doing the Big Mac Challenge.
It’s essentially eating four large Big Mac meals with milkshakes. In an hour.
We got a UNILAD to take the challenge for journalism, and it did not end well.
As you can see in the video, about 45 minutes in, Kieron taps out and is sick straight into a conveniently placed bag.
It was an exciting time in the office, everybody thought he would do it, but it definitely doesn’t seem as easy as it looks.
Would I recommend it to anyone? Absolutely not. It’s the milkshakes that get you. It’s put me off food and I don’t think I’ll eat a Big Mac again.
That’s made me hungry writing about all that food. Time to grab some lunch, I reckon.
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Tim Horner is a sub-editor at UNILAD. He graduated with a BA Journalism from University College Falmouth before most his colleagues were born. A previous editor of adult mags, he now enjoys bringing the tone down in the viral news sector.