Have you ever wondered what the very essence of Xbox smells like? In my head, I always got the whiff of stale Doritos with just a touch of Mountain Dew, but it appears Microsoft and Lynx had other ideas.
Tech giant Microsoft has partnered up with Lynx, AKA the official smell of your teenage years, to deliver a brand new fragrance known as Lynx Xbox. The range includes body spray, deodorant, and shower gel, so you can really cake yourself in the distinguished scent.
So, what does Xbox Lynx smell like? According to the official description, a whole bunch of stuff. Maybe too much stuff, in fact. To be fair, it wouldn’t be Lynx if it wasn’t an assault on the senses.
Here’s the poetic description from Lynx:
Lynx Xbox is a fresh scent of pulsing green citrus, featuring top notes of kaffir lime and winter lemon, aromatic herbal middle notes of mint and sage, and woody bottom notes of patchouli and clearwood. Containing a range of natural essential oils, the Xbox Lynx range comes with a sleek new look and features a body spray, deodorant, and shower gel.
Xbox ANZ boss Tania Chee added in a separate statement that Xbox Lynx can be used to “power up” before heading out to school or work in the morning. Hell, I imagine it’d go down a storm on a first date.
I can just picture my Tinder date telling me they can detect notes of mint and sage with woody bottom notes of patchouli and clearwood, before I proudly tell them that I’m wearing Lynx Xbox. We’d be skipping desert after that, I can tell you. Presumably because they’d get up and leave.
If you want to get your hands on Xbox Lynx – the Sex Panther of the gaming world – you can find it in stores Australia and New Zealand from July. There’s been no confirmation of it coming to the US or Europe yet, but we must live in hope.
Xbox creator Seamus Blackley doesn’t seem too jazzed about the existence of a scented range based on his work, by the way. He posted a tweet in response to the news that doesn’t exactly scream “I’m thrilled.”
Check it out below. I’d imagine he’s not getting a cut of the profits from this venture, then.
I seriously and honestly have no comment. I have no idea what a comment would even be on this. I’m frankly thinking of just going and drinking heavily at this point. https://t.co/hWZVyEHXjh
— Seamus Blackley (@SeamusBlackley) June 4, 2019
It’s unclear how prominent Xbox Lynx will be at Microsoft’s E3 press conference this year, but I’m sure the company will find a way to squeeze it in in between all the first-party games it has planned.
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Ewan Moore is a journalist at UNILAD Gaming who still quite hasn’t gotten out of his mid 00’s emo phase. After graduating from the University of Portsmouth in 2015 with a BA in Journalism & Media Studies (thanks for asking), he went on to do some freelance words for various places, including Kotaku, Den of Geek, and TheSixthAxis, before landing a full time gig at UNILAD in 2016.