I write with all sincerity that this is my absolute worst f*cking nightmare: a man woke up with feeling scratching inside his head, only to find a spider in his ear.
Liam Gomez awoke feeling quite strange – he could hear a soft scratching inside his head, as well as suffering earache and vertigo.
After phoning in sick at work, he put some olive oil in his ear to to ease the scratching. But the 27-year-old still felt a tickling in his ear, so he stuck a cotton bud in to investigate.
Here comes the icky part: when he pulled it out, he found spiders legs attached to the end of it.
Gomez, from Kent, England, then began the torturous process of removing the arachnid with a bobby pin and cotton bud – bit, by bit.
I put a couple of drops of olive oil in my ears and decided to go back to sleep for a bit – I could feel tickling in my ear, but put it down to the oil. When I woke up a couple hours later, I could still feel the sensation, but also hear a faint scratching sound, so I decided to investigate with a cotton bud.
My initial reaction was just to get the bloody thing out of me as fast as possible – I was obviously revolted as I hate spiders!
Once I’d calmed down a bit I did then think: ‘Well, that’s one for Facebook!’
The self-confessed arachnophobe, who has now vowed to sleep with earmuffs on, had swept away a nest of spiders just the night before.
I arrived home from work on Tuesday evening to discover a spider’s nest above my front door, with lots of hatchlings.
So I swept them away with a broom, and went to bed. The next morning, I woke with blocked ears and vertigo, so I called in sick to work.
It is just rotten luck that someone with a crippling fear of spiders would suffer such a horrid experience – ‘The irony is – I’m a web designer for a living!’ Gomez added.
Perhaps it was some sort of ‘revenge mission’ after the 27-year-old swept a bunch of them away. There’s just one worry left, though.
I didn’t think to check if it was female. I’m hoping it was male, because I’m really hoping it didn’t have to chance to lay eggs!
And like that, I shan’t be sleeping tonight.
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After graduating from Glasgow Caledonian University with an NCTJ and BCTJ-accredited Multimedia Journalism degree, Cameron ventured into the world of print journalism at The National, while also working as a freelance film journalist on the side, becoming an accredited Rotten Tomatoes critic in the process. He’s now left his Scottish homelands and took up residence at UNILAD as a journalist.