A woman has been banned from competing in Miss Bum Bum because her butt is too big.
In news that is as ludicrous as banning Einstein from receiving the Nobel Prize for being too clever, or stopping Serena Williams play Wimbledon because she has too much wrist, aspiring fitness model Mariana Soares has been disqualified from the infamous Brazilian butt contest.
Miss Bum Bum has banned Mariana from competing for the title because, ironically, her rear is 0.9 inches too big to be dubbed beautiful, apparently.
The contest has decreed a seemingly random upper measurement of 42.1 inches. Mariana’s butt measures in at a well-rounded 43 inches.
So, the judgemental folk at Miss Bum Bum have banned the 34-year-old from performing in a move that is startlingly reminiscent of the worrisome fat-shaming and body-shaming trends of late.
Soares is obviously devastated by the news, and was hoping an appearance in Miss Bum Bum would boost her fitness modelling career and public profile.
Mariana has also spent a lot of time and effort on her physique, of which she is unsurprisingly proud. The model even got 330ml of silicone implants in her behind to boost her chances of winning Miss Bum Bum, and follow in the footsteps of previous winner, Erika Cannella.
Conveniently, Canella has a hip size of exactly 42.1 inches.
Erika told Drops Cafe: “I think it is not fair to put a limit in the hip size. As they usually say, it is not the size that matters, but beauty.”
Mariana said: “I thought that participating in the contest would give me more importance in the media so that I could participate in fitness competitions all over the world.”
The hopeful contestant said she also wanted to “encourage other women to have a healthy life” and be happy in their own skin… something Miss Bum Bum organisers seem intent to oppose.
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.