Stock up on the sunscreen and slap on those shorts because we’re in for a hot one next week.
After a wholly unbearable week of cloudy, muggy weather, Britain will return to its longest, hottest summer since 1976 if bookies are to be believed.
Sounding like a delicious mix of vegetables and halloumi, the ‘Mediterranean melt’ – in fact a blast of hot air from the south – will tip temperatures over the 30°C mark until Friday with Thursday expected to make the UK hotter than Jamaica.
Forecasters at the Met Office are confident Brits can enjoy temperatures of 35°C, as bookies slash the odds to 2/1 that the country will hit its hottest day ever, beating 2003’s record 38.5°C.
Today’s almost mild 30°C will be followed by 34°C on Tuesday and Wednesday, possibly going up to 35°C on Thursday and Friday.
Lifehack: office flip-flops are allowed to be a thing during testing times. Trust me, I’m a Cornishman.
Speaking of God’s Country, a million people are predicted to have hit Cornwall in the first weekend of the school holidays, with 375,000 hitting up Brighton, 250,000 heading to Blackpool and a cool 200,000 beach-bumming in Bournemouth and Great Yarmouth.
If ever there was a time to arrange a tactical sickie, now would be the time to slap on the sunscreen so you don’t get burnt by the boss.
The MailOnline reports Met Office forecaster Simon Partridge said:
It’s getting warmer and we could see 35°C by Thursday.
After 30°C on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday look like 32°C, with 34°C possible on Wednesday and a good chance of over 34.5°C by Thursday, and Friday similar.
Heat will arrive from the south, passing over the continent. It will be hottest in the South and East.
If you’re not lucky enough to be in reach of the sea then you may want to hop online and bag this ridiculous deal from Argos.
With temperatures soaring who really needs a hot tub? We’re in paddling pool territory, and this 10ft bad boy will set you back less than £60!
Stocks are limited – the nearest one to Manchester is in the Warwick store, but head here to see if stocks are better in your area.
Hosepipe ban, shmosepipe ban!
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Tim Horner is a sub-editor at UNILAD. He graduated with a BA Journalism from University College Falmouth before most his colleagues were born. A previous editor of adult mags, he now enjoys bringing the tone down in the viral news sector.