‘On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… a ring made out of his own spunk.’
At the end of November, a husband will undergo the snip. He’ll soon be without his precious sperm – but with Christmas fast approaching, he’s got the perfect way to immortalise his manhood.
Forget chocolates, flowers and lingerie, this man is going all in with jewellery for his wife. However, there’s a twist: he’s wanting to give her a ring made out of his sperm.
The dad-of-five is armed with £1,500, and has reached out to online marketplace Bark to find a willing person to help him. Hopefully someone comes forward soon…
The loving husband told The Sun:
I know this is super weird, but I’m due to get a vasectomy at the end of November, and I wanted to do something funny with the last few living sperm I’ve got, kind of like a keepsake of my manhood.
The plan is to give the ring to my wife on Christmas day, wait for her to tell me it’s beautiful, let her wear it for a couple of hours, and then tell her what it’s actually made of.
Super weird? Maybe. Hilarious? Definitely. He had the brainwave after reading about rings made from breast milk, inspiring him to look into turning his semen into a dazzling piece of jewellery.
The husband and wife have been together for more than 20 years, and have been known to give each other lots of quirky, light-hearted gifts.
Explaining that he’s not a ‘complete nutter’, the husband added:
So you don’t think I’m a complete nutter, my wife and I have been together for more than 20 years now, have five kids (hence the vasectomy haha!) and since day one we’ve been pulling pranks on each other with quirky presents – this will hopefully be the best one yet though.
I know this type of jewellery can be quite expensive (I saw some breast milk ones online), so I’ve set aside around £1,500 for the ring, I’m not really looking to spend any more than that.
With the big day quickly approaching, it’ll soon be crunch time for the ring. Kai Feller, co-founder of Bark, is urging people to come forward to help make this husband’s wet dream a reality.
This is definitely one of the weirdest requests we’ve received in a while, but as always we’re happy to help our customers find a professional who can facilitate their needs, no matter how obscure!
Some might disapprove, but if people are having rings made out of breast milk and human ashes, why can’t sperm be made into one as well? We urge anyone with the skills to create this type of ring to get in touch with us.
Wait till she gets a load of this!
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After graduating from Glasgow Caledonian University with an NCTJ and BCTJ-accredited Multimedia Journalism degree, Cameron ventured into the world of print journalism at The National, while also working as a freelance film journalist on the side, becoming an accredited Rotten Tomatoes critic in the process. He’s now left his Scottish homelands and took up residence at UNILAD as a journalist.