Rich Men Are Getting Vasectomies So ‘Gold Diggers Can’t Trap Them With Babies’

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You’d imagine the life of a rich playboy would be one of endless carefree fun and relaxation, frolicking from spa to party and then back to the spa again.

However, it seems as though the life of a rich man has far more difficulties than simply remembering to wind up your Rolex watch and making sure to hire a discreet yet subtly witty butler.

Indeed, it would appear the wealthy and powerful men on Earth are living in constant fear of a monster which their vast riches and underground cave of vigilante gadgets cannot defeat: the gold digger.

Rich bachelors who vacation at the Hamptons are apparently so paranoid about sexual partners deliberately getting pregnant to extort their money, they’re undergoing vasectomies as a form of ‘insurance’.

According to a feature in the New York Post, urologists have reported seeing a higher number of monied bachelors undergoing vasectomies during spring and early summer, as they prepare for the Hamptons season.

Urologist Dr. David Shusterman said:

This extortion happens all the time. Women come after them. [They get pregnant and] want a ransom payment.

Some guys do an analysis of the cost — for three days of discomfort [after a vasectomy], it’s worth millions of dollars to them.

I never see a poor guy [asking] for a vasectomy. Rich guys are a population that’s abused a lot.

The New York Post also spoke with John *not his real name*, a 34-year-old bachelor who had the snip after a woman he slept with slyly stole his sperm from a used condom and attempted to impregnate herself.

After having intercourse together, the woman offered to get rid of the condom. After being a suspiciously long time in the loo, John found her trying to put the semen inside her vagina.

Real estate developer, John told the New York Post:

She denied it, but she tried to get herself pregnant. After that, I have to be a lot more careful.

Yikes. I mean, I’m currently down to my last £1.20 but at least I can rest assured nobody will be tricking it out of me…

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Julia Banim

Julia Banim

Jules studied English Literature with Creative Writing at Lancaster University before earning her masters in International Relations at Leiden University in The Netherlands (Hoi!). She then trained as a journalist through News Associates in Manchester. Jules has previously worked as a mental health blogger, copywriter and freelancer for various publications. When not Lad-ing about, she enjoys cooking, reading and trying not to fall over in Yoga.