A Coven Of Witches Have Used Their Dark Powers To Curse Martin Shkreli


The most hated man on the internet, Martin Shkreli, has made a lot of enemies recently and it seems that dark forces are now conspiring against him as well.

Shkreli’s recent dickish behaviour has pissed off a lot of people, including New York-based witchcraft enthusiast, Howl, who decided that as the legal system didn’t seem to phase the Pharma CEO, a spiritual punishment may be a better course of action, The Daily Dot reports.

Howl explained:

He [Shkreli] was smirking, laughing, being a child through the whole trial, and pleading the Fifth to every question. I realised clearly the justice system is not going to do anything, and even if they do, it’s going to be a minor slap on the wrist.

martin Shkreli web featuredFlickr

To punish Shkreli, Howl organised a ‘hex party’ in Brooklyn to make him pay for his actions and on Ash Wednesday his witches coven met. They anointed a wax effigy of Shkreli with hexing oil, with each of the spell-casters cursing Shkreli on a specific part of the voodoo doll’s body.

The spells included one over the doll’s head, wishing his ego died, in the hopes that the ever so smug Shkreli will get over his colossal pride and realise the damage he’s done and try to make amends. While another hexed his pocket, in the hopes that he’ll pay financially for the monetary damage he’s done to other people.


Howl claims that, despite the dark reputation of witches, hexes aren’t about hurting those cursed.

He said:

When people think of casting hexes, it’s like dark and scary magic, the black arts, and they don’t want to get near that. When in reality all we’re trying to do is get justice. The hex is not to bring anyone harm, but to make sure justice is served, and that there is a balance, and that balance is restored.

The witches also performed a binding ritual on a cloth doll that represented Shkreli, taking care to bind his throat, ‘so that his voice would be stifled and the truth would be heard’.

Realistically though, Howl’s curses are just a gesture and I doubt it’s going to have any real impact on Shkreli.

Then again…


Coincidence? Or have the dark powers begun to work their magic?