Dan Bilzerian’s Old Myspace Page Is Seriously Embarrassing

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America is rioting in the streets over the election, in other news, weed is now legal in Nevada

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We all had to start social media somewhere and for the nineties teens who grew up in a world no longer shackled by dial-up internet connection, that online haven was MySpace.

Amid the scene kids, basic HTML, black and white selfies (before they were called selfies), alliterative profile names and the annoying autoplay profile songs, I’m betting everyone would look back on their profile page and cringe.

…Even celebrity Casanova, Dan Bilzerian is no stranger to the ensuing embarrassment of nostalgia.

Despite being the world’s most famous playboy, the 36-year-old professional poker player and trust fund beneficiary wasn’t always the one to follow on social media.

Date night

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It's Friday, great

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Now, his 20 million Instagram followers are treated to X-rated scenes usually reserved for the silver screen and strip clubs.

Im in this pic. Photocred: @powersimagery

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But back in 2003 when MySpace was founded, his life looked a little different to online observers.

MySpace

Although the outdated selfies feature models in their underwear and joints the size of King Kong’s finger, there are a few differences…

Okay, so there are still beautiful women flocking to be photographed next to a grinning, clean-shaven Bilzerian, who sports some questionably shiny attire.

MySpace

…And you can see evidence that the gun-toting, champagne-swilling, speed boat-racing millionaire enjoyed the finer things in life from day one.

MySpace

But, the failed Navy SEAL graduate didn’t always have the beard and the body he has since successfully cultivated a career around.

MySpace

The old photographs prove that with a little hard work in the gym and millions in the bank, you can really flip reverse your life in unimaginable ways.

Meanwhile we can all take solace in the rise and rise of Bilzerain, from a guy offering a PC4PC with a page that was enough to make even MySpace Tom blush, to the curated Casanova we follow today.


Francesca Donovan

Francesca Donovan

A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you've never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.