A Florida burglar who told the homeowner to ‘go back to sleep’ when caught cooking himself breakfast was arrested this week.
There’s nothing quite as crippling as the craving for a good, filthy fry-up. Bacon, links, black pudding, square sausage, eggs – you just can’t beat it.
That said, there’s no amount of hunger in the world that should motivate you to break into someone else’s home just to rustle up a bit of breakfast.
As reported by Fox 13, Pinellas County investigators say Gavin Crim, a Marine, broke into a Safety Harbor home on Thursday (September 5) just after 4.00.
Did he steal anything? Swipe up some money or ornaments, perhaps? Nope, he simply walked through the unlocked rear door and began cooking, then eating, the victim’s food.
When the bewildered resident of the home found the 19-year-old chowing down on his mighty cooked meal, he was told: ‘Go back to sleep’.
You’ve got to admit, the brass balls on the late teenager would be impressive if he hadn’t broken the law. Alas, the burglar’s charms were not enough to convince the homeowner to simply retreat to their bed.
The resident threatened to call 911, which spurred Crim to flee the home away from police.
Deputies from the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office eventually found the man in a wooded and swampy area behind the house, where he was arrested.
According to the Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office, Crim confessed to breaking into the home but his motivations weren’t entirely clear – I guess we’ll never know if he wanted to steal anything or if he was just genuinely starving.
The police report outlines that the 19-year-old may have been under the influence of alcohol at the time of the incident.
Crim has since been charged with burglary of an occupied dwelling, and has since been released on a $1,000 bond.
Breakfast is the most important meal of the day, after all: it kick-starts your metabolism, allowing you to burn calories throughout the day, and it also gives you the energy required to get things done, whether it be your first article of the day or dealing with the public in a retail job.
In 2018, as per the BBC, the Association of UK Dieticians found only two thirds of Brits eat breakfast regularly.
That said, breaking into people’s homes to cook yourself a bacon sandwich definitely isn’t the best way to get back into eating breakfast. Maybe just pop into Greggs.
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After graduating from Glasgow Caledonian University with an NCTJ and BCTJ-accredited Multimedia Journalism degree, Cameron ventured into the world of print journalism at The National, while also working as a freelance film journalist on the side, becoming an accredited Rotten Tomatoes critic in the process. He’s now left his Scottish homelands and took up residence at UNILAD as a journalist.