Guy Pays $3.7M To Have Sex With Megan Fox, Has Terrible Time
A not too bright businessman looking for love in all the wrong places says he was conned out of a small fortune by an escort agency, which promised to hook him up with Megan Fox and other A-list stars.
Yu ‘Martin’ Xu claims to have paid $3.7 million to the Sydney-based agency Royal Court Escort for ‘sexual services’ from Megan Fox, Independence Day actress Angelababy, and Victoria’s Secret model Candice Swanepoel.
Unsurprisingly, none of the stars turned up, leaving the naive Xu so furious that he decided to sue Royal Court Escorts to try and get his cash back, The Daily Mail reports.
Mr Xu’s statement of claim said:
It was agreed that if (Mr Xu) paid the sum of $3.7 million (the agency) would provide Megan Fox, Candice Swanepoel and ‘Angelababy’ as escorts for sexual services.
Incredibly though, rather than hold their hands up and say ‘yeah we tricked him,’ Royal Court Escorts are actually defending their claim, although they’re yet to submit a defence.
Assuming they actually have a defence and aren’t just scrambling for time, I’d love to read their statement.
Here’s a hypothetical one they could use if their lawyers are struggling:
Your honour, we totally have Megan Fox, Angelababy and Candice Swanepoel on our books, you just can’t see them because they go to another school and you won’t know it.
In fact they’re in Canada, along with that girlfriend we all had when we were teenagers who we met on holiday. You won’t know her either.
Seriously though, how the hell did this guy manage to become a millionaire if he’s so easily tricked? Did he not stop and think these three women with super successful careers don’t need to take on a side career in escorting?
Maybe we should let him take a look at these magic beans we’ve got in the office. They’ll make a great investment…