Another day, another foolhardy amateur animal-catcher tries to wrestle a shark with inevitably gruesome results.
Josh “Ferrett” Neille dived into shark infested waters off the coast of Queensland, Australia after being overcome with a desire to “land the 9ft shark” that was circling his boat.
Apparently mistaking the majestic sea predator for a theme park bucking bronco, the young Aussie man from Victoria set forth on his cretinous mission armed with only a rope.
Neille, in his own words, “tried to wrestle it to the boat and tail rope it”. However, after battling with the shark – and presumably his own sheer dumb spontaneity – for about 15 seconds. Neille “found himself locked in the shark’s jaws”.
Unsurprisingly, the shark didn’t take well to being jumped on by a dreadlocked adrenaline junkie so the wild animal “thrashed a chunk from the top of [Neille’s] right thigh”.
Finding the funny side in the hospital, Neille added:
I was lucky not to loose my sea cucumber instead. It was a quick and regrettable decision that I realise was a stupid move…
However the plan was to release the shark without having to gaff or kill the large shark by tail roping it. This was unfortunate not to be so in the end.
Neille, who appears to spend much of his spare time catching and killing wild animals and sharing trophy photos to Faecbook, also shared his thanks with the staff at the Weipa Hospital for being “very helpful”.
Perhaps they can extend their course of treatment to get this man an appreciation for wild creatures and their right to not be manhandled.
Nature – 1, Man – 0. Again.
A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you’ve never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.