What better way to draw attention to something than to draw a massive dick on/around whatever it is you’re trying to get noticed?
No, seriously. Cast your mind back and try to remember a time when that hasn’t worked. I can (maybe) guarantee you won’t find one.
Need one of your mates to take a long, hard look at themselves? Draw a dick on their face. Want to highlight something important in a school textbook? Dick. Does your teacher need to look at the whiteboard ASAP? Nothing a drawing of a dick won’t sort.
Proving my well-thought-out, eloquent, and almost certainly scientifically proven point is one area in Middlesbrough, which succumbed to a frenzy of penis graffiti recently.
Local residents had reportedly become fed up with the council ignoring a number of potholes on roads in the Acklam area, taking measures into their own hands by drawing a series of dicks around each and every pothole. Now that’s dedication for you.
Resident Brad Nicholson said the potholes had been there for around a year, but the council only fixed them just days after the graffiti appeared.
Posting to local Facebook group Loving Acklam, the resident wrote, alongside a picture of the repaired potholes:
The power of the Willy. Repaired this morning 25-04-2019. Only been there a year, well done Middlesbrough Council.
The power of the willy indeed. However, as per the BBC, Middlesbrough Council said they were already in the Acklam area to fix potholes when it was made aware of the penis graffiti.
The council added that repairs are done on a ‘priority basis’.
A spokesman for Middlesbrough Council said:
Middlesbrough, like all local authority areas in the country, has issues with potholes and repairs are carried out on a priority basis determined by the risk they pose to highway users.
Currently, however, we are carrying out pre-planned works in the Acklam area and staff were able to visit the nearby site on Fane Grove when the matter was reported to us and have patched over the hole.
Mr Nicholson told the BBC he didn’t know who painted the penises, but said it was about time something was done about all the potholes.
Regardless of what people say, there’s no denying the potholes were fixed – and sharpish! – once the dicks were drawn around them.
What did I tell you?
If you have a story you want to tell send it to UNILAD via [email protected]