Slade, The Pogues, WHAM! – all undeniable titans of the music world, but just how much are they swimming in year in, year out when it comes to Christmas time?
In reality it’s pretty depressing just how much dollar these guys are raking in around the festive period.
Don’t get me wrong – they wrote some serious classics but these guys are making far more than an incredibly good annual salary just for one month’s worth of drinking, devouring mince pies, and eating your body weight in Stilton.
So in no particular order, here’s what some of the biggest names in festive music are making EVERY FUCKING YEAR, according to the NME.
Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas
Think what you like about All I Want For Christmas but at the end of the day it’s still a festive classic.
Though the amount she made isn’t known for sure, it’s thought to be somewhere in the region of £50 million overall.
One fun fact for y’all is that despite being a flop in the British charts, the high pitched fast paced tempo of the tune went down very well in Asia – turning Platinum twice in Japan.
So Mariah Carey is big in Japan.
Slade – Merry Christmas Everybody
Noddy Holder never was graced with good looks – but he was graced with the voice of a demi-God.
From Get Down And Get With It right through to Cum On Feel The Noize the Black Country band changed the world of music in more ways than one, yet it’s Merry Xmas Everybody that must be bring in a tasty pay packet every single year.
But how much? Well let’s just say it’s more than enough to enjoy a Merry Xmas as Noddy and the gang are pretty much guaranteed to bring in a little more than £512,000.
WHAM! Last Christmas
Wham! narrowly missed out to Band Aid in the 1984 race to Christmas #1 slot but I doubt George Michael is pulling too much of his hair out at the fact.
Why? Because he and the other members of Wham! are making around £412,000 every fucking year.
Hopefully George has stop whining about last Christmas considering he’s making that much dollar year in year out.
Finally: The Pogues – Fairytale of New York
Interestingly, Fairytale of New York was written by Shane MacGowan after Elvis Costello told him that he didn’t think he’d be able to write a Christmas song that wasn’t ‘slushy’.
Annoyed by the claim, Shane bet Costello an unknown amount of money that he could indeed write a Christmas song and then he went ahead and wrote, what I believe to be, the greatest Christmas song on record, selling way over 1.1 million copies across the globe.
And just how much does Shane make year in year out from the banger? Around £386,000 a year according to statistics revealed in 2013. That’s one helluva lot of money.
Merry Christmas everybody – just 22 days in advance.
Joseph Loftus is a Gold Standard NCTJ journalist with four years experience working for international and regional press.
As well as working for UNILAD and LADbible, Joseph has worked as Liverpool Correspondent for Unsigned & Independent Magazine, as well as stints with the Liverpool Echo and Warrington Guardian.