I don’t know ladies – you spend your life bracing yourself stoically against the cruel rip of the bikini wax strip, only for wild front gardens to come back into Vogue.
Those attending New York fashion week may have had to blink a few times when they spotted a bunch of models strutting down the Kaimin runway with a crop of artfully groomed crotch curlies on display.
However, look again and it’s apparent this is no natural vagitation – these daring fashionistas are actually sporting one of the raunchier trends of 2018 – the vagina wig.
Also referred to as a ‘merkin,’ these fluffy embellishments are nothing new. Indeed, merkins can be dated back to the roaring 1600’s, where they were usually donned by sex workers.
Now, dauntless South Korean designer Kaimin is hoping merkins will sprout their fuzzy roots within the cold, shiny pubic area of high fashion.
Kaimin’s models were showing off the hip label’s 2018 Spring and Summer collection, which had the deceptively traditional title of ‘Oriental Garden.’
A hopelessly unfashionable person such as myself might have assumed this referred to some sort of floral ensemble, but it appears this is actually a nod to another type of front garden altogether…
Look, these are no ordinary muffin sweaters. These punk-style disco bushes are genuine works of art, ‘growing’ in various styles and colours.
Some even have teeny weeny Mohawks – which are actually weirdly quite cute – to match the full on Mohawks sculpted out of head hair.
Paired with striking eyeliner and iridescent, next millennium style clothing Kaimin has created a truly memorable look.
I give u the vagina wig!
Off the run way, saves u money & makes ur partner upset. I always thought I was fashion forward ?. Soz bae but the Bush is here to stay, well fashion is fashion you know & I like to b on trend ?.#fashion #vaginawig #fashionstyle #Fashionista pic.twitter.com/MRChrWtUTq
— kay (@bellebybow) February 16, 2018
According to a press release by Kaiman, the purpose behind this flocculant fashion fest is ‘to assist irregular silhouettes’ and ‘to bridge the gap of hard versus soft.’
Kaiman – whose multi-faceted CV describes her as being a ‘conceptual artist, creative and visual director, designer, film director and actress’ – has never been one to keep things low-key.
She’s previously worked with quirky trendsetters such as Lady Gaga and Bjork, giving the following description of her work on her website:
Kaimin explores ideas of fetishism, eroticism and sadomasochism through clothes that dissect and distort the human physique, challenging accepted standards of what clothing should do for the body.
KAIMIN uses innovative, high-tech materials to thrust elements of bondage and punk into the future for a surreal demeanor that is still delicate and feminine.
The vivid palette with a varied, nearly science-fiction choice of fabrics lets Kaimin’s signature love for abstraction and primeval sexuality come to the fore in a playful way.
The word is Merkins not vagina wig, because:
1) The Vagina is inside the body and thusly cannot a wig wear.
2) Merkin is funnier..use it conversation today.
— Monkeymanbob (@Monkeymanb0b) February 16, 2018
Prema Hair creative director Dale Delaporte – who lent a hand backstage – told Whimn:
Because the Kaimin collection has a huge central theme of pride in your body and your sexuality – although they are not mutually exclusive – we had a lot of freedom here,
We really wanted to push the futuristic punk aesthetic of this seasons’ collection and having matching hair and merkins was perfect.
We worked hard on figuring out the best way to get them made and to have them looking as natural as possible and the results speak for themselves!
Sooooo, vagina wigs are now a thing?! Stop the world I want to get off.
— Jackie Woolley (@Jackie_Woolley) February 16, 2018
I don’t think I’ll ever stop laughing at the fact vagina wigs used to be a thing
— Misty Virginia-Slim (@oh_okaywhatever) February 14, 2018
So many questions remain. Will you soon be able to nab a fancy new rug for yourself at your local Topshop?
Will you be able to get a permed-merkin or perhaps even a Friends era Rachel-hair merkin?
It looks like it’s time to roll out the shaggy welcome mat for a bold new era in fashion…