Tesla’s New Roadster Will Be Fastest Production Car Ever Made

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Elon Musk just announced Tesla will be making a Roadster sports car. Cue: The sound of techie gear-heads the world over salivating. 

Rightly so. This car would be enough to make Dominic Toretto crack a smile. The new version of the Roadster, a convertible no less, will muster zero to 60 mph in 1.9 seconds, quicker than the average Formula 1 car.

It’ll hit a top speed of a quarter mile in 8.9 seconds, in a world where 10-second cars are coveted, so The Fast and The Furious taught us.

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Top speed reaches somewhere north of 250 mph, putting it in the realm of the fastest production cars on the planet, like the Bugatti Chiron and Koenigsegg Agera, reports Wired.

Not to mention, it’s also pretty handy for the school run, with four seats – if you’re travelling with two small people – decent cargo room.

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With an astounding 620 miles of range, thanks to a 200-kilowatt hour battery pack, it’s about double what you get in the most capable Model S.

That gets you from Inverness to Cornwall – essentially the whole length of the UK – without having to charge up.

No surprise the base price will be $200,000 and reserving your spot on the list will cost you $50,000, but that’s still cheaper than the Bugatti.

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If the car itself wasn’t enough to get your gears going, just wait until you hear about how Elon Musk introduced the beast.

After introducing his new electric 18-wheeler truck, which looks pretty impressive in itself, the lights dimmed to blackout and Musk stepped off stage.

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At that moment, Sabotage by the Beastie Boys came on over the speaker system, the 18-wheeler’s cargo hold opened and the Roadster glided out from its cavernous depths, like a weirdly majestic technological birthing ceremony.

He said:

The point of this is to give the hardcore smackdown to gasoline cars.

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The original Roadster was Tesla’s first car, with the proof of concept built between 2008 to 2012, designed by the young automaker’s as way of showing electric cars could be cool, not just overgrown golf carts.

We’ve come a long way and they’ve certainly made their point with this revival.

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Let’s just hope Musk brings the Roadster to market before humanity is drastically altered beyond recognition when we are forced to ‘merge’ with technology to compete with machine (like the ones he creates), as he has previously predicted.

Speaking at the World Government Summit in Dubai, the tech mogul explained how eventually, machines will outpace the human brain and replace people in certain fields of work.

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He said:

Over time I think we will probably see a closer merger of biological intelligence and digital intelligence.

It’s mostly about the bandwidth, the speed of the connection between your brain and the digital version of yourself – particularly output.

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The motoring future is here people – well, by 202o, if Musk’s notoriously generous ETAs are to be believed.

But, it’s worth the wait; a work of art, even for someone like me, who still proudly brandishes a provisional driving licence at night club doormen.


Francesca Donovan

Francesca Donovan

A former emo kid who talks too much about 8Chan meme culture, the Kardashian Klan, and how her smartphone is probably killing her. Francesca is a Cardiff University Journalism Masters grad who has done words for BBC, ELLE, The Debrief, DAZED, an art magazine you've never heard of and a feminist zine which never went to print.